Week 35+1 – Up to date, what’s happening right now!

This is me, right now. 35 weeks pregnant and whilst I’m constantly told that I look about four months along, I’m about 8 months and this, for me, is huge. So lately what’s been going on? Well, lets start with my mental break down last week.

Last week was our growth scan, our last time seeing our little not so little anymore bean on the screen, before we eventually meet her in person. After being told I was measuring so small, and having early induction mentioned (if growth isn’t on track) I was hoping to have some sort of idea as to whether they’d be, and by they I mean I’d be pushing her out earlier than anticipated. Unfortunately the scan proved to be a bit disappointing. First of all, the doctor doing it said about three words to us and and answered no questions and offered no reassurance, but secondly, our little girl was so far down and tucked away that they pretty much found it impossible to get measurements. This meant we came away with only two measurements from this scan, and now I have absolutely no clue how she’s doing and what the doctors are likely to decide. Sob sob sob. Actually, that’s exactly what I did – sob. Having greater expectations from this scan, where we didn’t even really see our little girl and only had the heartbeat pointed out, well, I was bound to be let down and I absolutely was. This was probably one of the worst days so far.

Right now, I’m waiting for a midwife appointment tomorrow and the consultant appointment to discuss growth next week – very anxiously waiting. I’m battling induction or naturally going into labour in my head and trying to be prepared for both possibilities, but to be quite honest I cannot imagine her coming early. Cue the first time mother freak out. 

I. Know. Nothing (John Snow – sorry). I get frightening thoughts along the lines of, ‘what the hell do I do with a baby..‘ as labour approaches and we actually have this little person to care for and be her entire life system basically. From what I gather they don’t issue an instruction manual at the hosptial, which would be really bloody handy. Hasn’t anybody suggested this?

Maybe I need one of those books – first time parenting for dummies..

Anyway, that’s enough from me. I’ll keep you guys updated this time. 

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Week 14 – Whoops? Scans, shopping and the second trimester!

Some slight inactivity I’ll admit 😉 But here’s for a wonderful wonderful recap. My fears of something bad being revealed at the scan – idiotic! Everything was absolutely fine, we got to see our little bambino inside of my tummy! First it was asleep, all curled up looking like a kidney bean and my thoughts were. ‘is that it?.’ I honestly was thinking that it doesn’t look like a baby at all, until it moved. Yes, it got up, faced right at us (on the screen anyway) and had a good old wriggle and dance, WOW. We actually saw this little thing’s arms and legs wriggling around! Did I cry you might ask? No, at the stupidest time ever, I got the uncontrollable giggles, which actually got in the way of the sonographer trying to capture a photo of said kidney bean. Luckily enough, I maintained a moment of sanity for a second, and here we are.. 

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The only thing we didn’t expect at the scan was the date being a little less far along as I’d thought, so this pushed us back a little and so finally, today, I am 14 weeks pregnant! The second trimester!! This hopefully means goodbye to the morning sickness and feeling crappy, getting a little bump to display soon and hopefully a nice glow in which makes all the sickness seem so far worth it.

Other than the scan, we are no further forward with establishing somewhere to live, whoopee! But we did get to go on a big baby spending spree where we bought lots of little pairs of socks, and baby toiletries etc. We actually managed to buy the travel system too, and the one I wanted! Which I absolutely adore and cannot wait to use haha – shh, maybe too soon for that. But we’ll get there 🙂 

Up and coming, I have the consult at the doctors tomorrow for being so underweight, which dear god do I have to go to? I hardly fancy being told off for not eating enough and lectured, when I know very well I have to eat more and actually keep this thing inside of me growing – thanks doc, I had no idea. Hopefully they’ll give me some idea of how to gain a little weight that the baby needs, and some extra growth scans wouldn’t go a miss 😉 Fingers crossed extra scans! 

Aaaaand in a couple weeks we have the midwife again, and a couple weeks after that we have the 20 week scan. This is THE scan, the fingers crossed it’s what you want scan, the pink or blue scan, the dangly bits or not dangly bits scan. EEK! Lots to look forward to and to not look forward to. The joys!

Week 11+2 – BOREDOM.

Honestly, I don’t know whether I’m just incredibly bored being off work all week, or it’s just because I’ve been waiting for the last seventeen days.. for the scan tomorrow. Oh, THE SCAN IS TOMORROW. Wow, I don’t know whether I’m scared, excited or just a little numb about the whole thing actually. I can’t quite grasp the concept that tomorrow at 3pm I’ll be going to the hospital to have goo dolloped on my belly, and some stranger looking at my baby before I get to, might I add. I think a little part of me is fully expecting to go there and find out that actually, there’s nothing there, or whatever was inhabiting me, has ceased to and has vacated the premises because actually, my womb doesn’t resemble the egyptian beach holiday it was hoping for. I know that sounds awful, but that’s what I’m worried about and I’m trying to be realistic in case that happens. Lets face it, I’ll be devastated and sobbing quite a lot. I’ve grown strangely attached to this little tadpole peanut jelly bean thing growing inside of me, or at least the idea of this thing being a baby eventually, being loved and adored and hopefully being well behaved and the cutest thing ever. But oddly enough, despite wanting everything to be okay and being worried, I still can’t quite grasp that this is happening. There’s very little to convince me.. aside from the now three missing monthly witches, the throwing up, nausea and indigestion. 

Actually, on that note, just this morning I was saying to my mam that it looks like the sickness has stopped (not that I’ve had a lot regardless) and it’s just the nausea. This was about five minutes after I’d had a yoghurt, and about two small mouthfuls of chicken noodles, before I threw it all up. Irony loves me what can I say. Since then I’ve eaten two mince pies and a custard doughnut from greggs though, so all is well, not healthy, but well.

That’s all I have to report for now, my hopes and fears, boredom and sickness. How wonderful. Maybe I’ll update tomorrow with info from the scan and a pic hopefully! 

 

Week 9 – First antenatal appointment!

That’s right, the first midwifey appointment, where I got to pee in a tub, have my blood pressure checked and four vials of blood drained from my poor little body. Not only that but I had the pleasure of answering about a thousand questions about mine and OH’s health background and about birth plans and all sorts, as well as finding out that because I’m underweight, I need a few more consults than usual at the hospital, which means more weeing in a tub. The NHS really are so lucky for my generous contributions, aren’t they. The blood taking was the worst (I hate needles!) but I suppose if I can’t get through that.. there really is no hope for me harbouring and eventually bringing into the world something somewhat larger than a watermelon. 

On a positive – THE SCAN DATE. AAAAH. The scan date is actually the 21st Feb, 17 days away. That’s just over two weeks to actually see this little grape/strawberry sized thingy that’s growing inside of me, causing me nausea, discomfort and hormonal mood swings. It better be bloody worth it in the end. Right now I’m just hoping everything’s healthy and happy and going ahead as planned, even if my body absolutely cannot take it. Oh well.

17 days to go. 

OH, and I’m also convinced we’re having a boy. I think I mentioned this previously, but it’s just some weird sense. There are baby girl names we love to bits, that suit so well and we are so certain of.. and no boy names. NO BOY NAMES. And whilst my side of the family want a girl, his side wants a boy and I have no faith in me getting my own way in this. Plenty of time to think I guess, but the cute little lacey dresses in ASDA’s baby event are toying with me! No fair!

Enough rambling from me anyway, inabit 🙂 x